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Bent My Wookie
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The Spin Starts Here
The Superficial
Treading Water 101
Victim of Narcissism


Black People Love Us
Elijah Wood is Very, Very Gay
Sexy Losers
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Television Without Pity
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Three Way Action
White Ninja Comics




Saturday, December 14, 2002
I'm bored. Yawn. And I don't have anything to look forward to tonight either. How pathetic. Hurry up and ring me back, cocksuckers!

I saw Ghost Ship last night (which I have hilariously re-titled Ghost Shit) and it reeked. Although, Alex Dimitriades was in it! Hee! It must have been filmed on the Gold Coast or something. That hideous woman from ER was in it too. The point was that one of my friends who was recently dumped and bitter like me, was totally perky! Like, ridiculously so! I think I'm going to have to change "Perkiness before noon" to "Perkiness period" on my HATE list. She was all "blahblah love of my life is coming back to Brisbane blahblah going to hang out with these really cool people blahblah," and I was all "chug chug chug" of my beverage.

I had a huge plan to swing my sweet ass down to Coles to tempt Coles Dude into asking me out for a drink, and meeting up in the Valley. I had mapped out the conversation already. He wasn't there, of course. MotherFUCKER. Some hideous guy served me, and he scares me. I mean, he has freakin' red hair!!!! Ick! Go back to Scotland, flamey. So that's another day I haven't seen him. Time since flirtage: 9 days. Dun!

I bet he is partnered up.

Actually, I bet he's heinous, and I forgot to take off my beer/desperate goggles.

Actually, I bet he has a small cock. PERFECT. I need me a practice dick.

*looks at watch*

*stares at phone*