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Monday, February 13, 2006
Okay, so it turns out I'm really bad at breaking up with people. Well, I suppose I didn't really want to break up. But like, I'm having a pretty shit time down the coast this weekend, and it's rainy, and it's boring, and there's nothing to do, and there are a thousand sharks feeding on the beaches so I don't want to get all arm-rippy, and Cap Guy is cranky because there's nowhere good to eat on the coast, so we have a bit of a fight. He says that I never seem to enjoy myself and nothing he does seems to make me happy. Which is sort of true, but it's not as if I want him to make me happy, or need him too.

A brief sidenote: I suppose I haven't been overly happy at the moment, but I think that's mostly due to my usual Dawei neuroses. I think my concerns of continuing the relationship with Cap Guy are contributing, but I have other worries plaguing my thoughts. Stupid brain.

Anyway, so you'd think this would be a good time to air some feelings and make with the cutting loose part. But then I think "why am I being such a cunting bitch? It's not as if he's doing anything particularly bad? And what am I throwing away? For what? Etc.!" and my mouth does some severe back-peddling. And then his little face gets all crumpled and cute and anxious and I feel so terrible I ended up giving him a quite spectacular blowjob.

UGH. Nice one, Dawei. What will you do next time you want to break up? Let him fist you? Sigh.

But yeah. And also, it would be quite cunty to head to Dumpsville on the day before Valentine's Day. Not that I believe in such a shitty, stupid day. But surely it can't be good karma? I'm starting to realise why so many faggots are such utter desperate whores. Although they are usually too ugly to land a steady partner, so who knows.

But I cheered myself up tonight by watching Australia's Biggest Loser. Fat people = hilarity. Of course, the fat is usually quite horrendously frightening, but I'm a sucker for a make-over show. And the producers are really good at picking fat fucks who are still attractive in the face, so when they lose the weight they all end up looking really good. Oh, pity. You are a godsend in times of mental crisis!

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