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Wednesday, October 22, 2003
Wow, the 17th Annual ARIA Awards! Party!

Only not. Did anyone else sit through this dreck? This year's awards seemed particularly tedious and boring. And I sat through the entire. Cunting. THING! I like to think it's because I was doing some serious procrastination (got a motherfucking assignment due tomorrow which I have done pretty much nothing on, stupid uni), but I think I'm actually just a little bit... sad. And no, that wasn't an invitation for my comment-y things to be filled up with "We already knew that, Dawei! And you're gay too!"

Some thoughts though:

Rove McManus: Useless. His written material never works on his show, let alone in a big stand-up gig. Sometimes he can come up with a good quip (heh, "quip") on the spot, but other than that, he is pretty cringeworthy. Although I guess I should just be lucky fat cunt Eddie McGuire wasn't hosting, right?

Delta: Sorry dude, but your wig sucked. I was expecting like, a good wig! Not only was it styled in a dyke-mullet, but it looked fireproof. Wouldn't her record label get her one of those awesome wigs made out of a refugee's hair or something? No matter, I think she still looked pretty good. Although I did feel a bit guilty about checking out a cancer patient's ta-tas.

Peta Wilson: When you look and sound more manly than Courtney Act, you've got problems. And who the fuck are you again? Same goes for Daniel MacPherson. I hope he doesn't think he is still relevent to Australian popular culture. All I can remember from him, was he was the fat, ugly, Neighbours dude who popped Holly Valance's cherry, and had a massive appendicitis scar. Whatever. Fuck off.

Darren Hayes: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Way to butcher my favourite Delta song, you big flaming 'mo. Christ. I bet Delta wished it was six months in the future, so she could be dead and not have to listen to your whiny, nasal, pansying.

(I will admit though, that my ice-cold, bitter heart somewhat melted when they showed her sobbing after the song! Stupid Delta Goodrem being adorable. I'm choosing to believe that they were tears of pain.)

Keith Urban: Ugly. Faggot.

Emmanuel Carella: See above. Although I think he's strangely compelling, despite his blatant hideousness. Maybe he'd be a good ride. I'll have to look into that. I'll see if I can get him backstage at the X-tina concert!

Yawn. That's all I can remember, really. Christ. I remember I quite enjoyed last year's ceremony, as george were up for a fair few, and performed and were their usual awesome selves. This year the "international stahs" were particularly gruesome (Hillary Duff is NOT a huge mega-star. LeAnne Rimes (ugly)? The fuck?), and the live acts were shite. Amiel needs to be lashed for releasing that cunting Lovesong.

So, what were your favourite memories of this illustrious event?

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