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Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Stupid blog. Be more interesting!

Actually, I have been relatively busy at the moment. Well, sort of. Just boring assignments and more job hunting and shit. Actually, the main reason why I haven't updated more is because my stupid mother has cut back basically all her hours and is now home all the time arranging tea roses and clutching her pearls. Which is annoying for ME because when I have the time or inspiration to sit my ass down I don't have the privacy or freedom to write! She is so damn nosy. And that's not even considering the issue of porn. Like, rude much? Get back to work, woman.

And really, I need that time to be... cough... alone. Stupid Cap Guy and I haven't found time to do it in like, forever. I thought faggots were meant to be, like, erect all the time? It's a bit sad really. I don't think he likes me all that much. Or at least doesn't find me particular sexy which... how rude! I'm sexy! Well, maybe not sexy per se, but I got the moves yo. But he's always got some excuse to not want to do it. Like, he's sleepy, or hungry, or needs to shit, or needs to pee, or we are too drunk, or I have morning breath, or haven't-eaten-all-day breath, or there's something he wants to watch on TV, or the phone rings, or something. Maybe he doesn't like me because I'm like, the anti-tan at the moment. Sigh. Another thing I can't do with my stupid mother hanging around.

But yeah, the non-intimacy thing is a bit annoying. Maybe he's dipping it elsewhere? God how... embarrassing if that was happening! I don't really think he is though. I know he's a bit pissed because I've continued to be unemployable, but surely that's not reason enough to run off with some cheap twinky butt-bitch slut? And anyway, I subtly weigh his testicles when I see him, and they are always full. I know that sounds a bit lame and psycho-stalker of me, but he has these enormous testicles and they feel REALLY heavy when he hasn't blown for a while. Meh. I think I just need to work on my seduction skills. Before Cap Guy, the seduction phase of my sex life was non-existent. It was like:

1. Arrive at bar.
2. Drink.
3. Scope for potentials.
4. Drink.
5. #$@%Q#%#^????
6. Taxi home, sending gloating SMSes to friends.

Dumb relationships. Now I don't have the alcoholic's advantage, I have to like, put the move on and be arousing and shit. And I tried to be very casual about it, but he said it was too creepy when I said "ok, let's fool around" and reached for his dick. Men are so fickle.

But I should cut him a bit of slack too. I mean, he is pretty busy. What with me doing uni stuff and the occasional job search, and him working all week, and then us being out all weekend, and him trying to find another place to buy, it's no wonder some things have to be put temporarily on the backburner. I just wish it wasn't that, because I really need my arse licked. Sigh. But I'm going down (hee hee) tonight, so hopefully the drought will break. Fingers crossed, y'all!

PS -- I just broke the fly on my favourite jeans. Stupid button-fly. Now my favourite jeans are fucked, and my favourite t-shirt has developed two big-ass holes under the arms. Sigh. I love that t-shirt. Oooh, maybe I should become a designer! I reckon I'd make fuck-off clothes. But I guess I'd have to like, learn to sew and shit right? Sigh. Everything is so hard. Why can't someone just swoop in and drop a hot job in my lap. WHY IS THE UNIVERSE OUT TO GET ME?!?!?!

PPS -- I sound like a bit of a whiney poof in this post, my bad. Sorry. I'm stressed!