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Thursday, June 23, 2005
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Yes, that master piece of Photoshopping did take me three full days to do, so shut the fuck up. I'm really proud of it! Notice how I extended the size of the graphic to make room for my (hand-drawn!) speech bubble? And the font is in "Comic"? I'm such the graphic artist! I'm adding that classification to my Seek searches. And watch out Ruth, soon I might start doing my own comic adventures!

But yes. Mr Wil Anderson. Really, I'm quite flattered that you think my work is amusing, but a little Harvard-style referencing in your flyer or program would be appreciated, or at least spread some of the wealth my way. I went to see Kill Wil the other day with Mother at the Powerhouse, and was shocked to hear all my best Ian Thorpe jokes! How unoriginal. The rest of his routine was that tired working class schtick. Yawn. I don't mind Wil (well, on-radio-Wil), but his stand-up was a bit too left-wing-drugs-are-funny-swearing-is-HILARIOUS thing. And it was made even worse because the absolute tools who were sitting behind us were like:

Wil: *mildly amusing, Dawei circa 1993 penis joke*
Annoying Asshats: WOOOOAHH!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! No he di'nt! No. He! DI'NT!


But Mother seemed to enjoy herself, but I suspect that's mainly because her panties are moistened by just mentioning Wil Anderson's name. And Watt at the Powerhouse is pretty decent, I guess.

And do you know who else shits me? Cunting Douglas Wood. SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY. God. Does anyone else find him really phoney? Like, quit it with the Australianisms already. They aren't half-transparent, douche. I found it so annoying how he was all "where's my beer, mate!" and "how did my footie team go, sheila!" as soon as he stepped off the plane. Meanwhile, he speaks with a full-blown American accent, lives in the US, and moved to Iraq to make money from a decimated country. Uhm yeah. Real Australian. I bet he wasn't even held hostage, and just staged it to make money from selling his story to gullible magazines and news stations (*cough* Ten) who are itching to find the latest Aussie Battler to endear to the idiotic public who listen to Shannon Noll and vote for Regina Bird. I swear, if anyone calls him an "Aussie Hero", or how he kept the "Aussie spirit alive" or some shit they will have to answer to me. Oh, and you look stupid with that shaved head.