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Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Because I am completely uninspired and boring (seriously. I can't even come up with lame assignment topics for university. So this is what it feels like to be stupid!), I've totally pinched QueerPenguin's little celebrity face finder! I must admit it entertained me for quite a while. Although my sense of self did take a bit of a battering. Like, check out the progression of my matches:

1. David Beckham. Nasal, high-voiced, but quite ripped and generally well-fancied. Well, I'll assume that he is, despite the unfortunate hair changes and skirt wearing and Victoria-ness. And I like a white man with diamonds.

Patented Dawei Confidence-o-Metre: Bang Bang Chicken

2. Val Kilmer. Bloated, drug-fucked weirdo with a severe air of paedophile. But he used to be quite sexy, I suppose. I'd do him. Maybe. In a full-body condom.

Patented Dawei Confidence-o-Metre: Salami, with those icky hot bits

3. Rupert Grint. Ginger, prepubescent gangloid with wonky-ass lips. Genitals surely resemble a Ken-doll. I so do NOT have a piggy, up-turned nose!

Patented Dawei Confidence-o-Metre: Vegetable Stock

4. Brad Pitt. Cliché. But a classic, I suppose.

Patented Dawei Confidence-o-metre: Edible KY Warming Lube

5. Peter Jackson. Troll.

Patented Dawei Confidence-o-Metre: Corpse's Foreskin.

My GOD. What an odd mix. But at least they got a few chiselled blonds going on. Well, so maybe a few of those aren't natural blonds, but you know what I mean. Sigh. There were a few others too, but they were like, Asians or women or people I'd never heard of, and boring! But I feel a bit bad, because according to that stupid generator I'm only a few hairs shy of being Peter Jackson! Or if I dyed my downstairs red (or shaved it off), I'm like, a doppelgänger for Rupert "Ripper" Grint. They really should have a warning on that web-page for those with self-esteem issues.

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