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Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Oh, my GOD. I just remembered I had a dream last night that my cousin and I had sex... and how good it felt. I feel so dirty. I'm so like, totally incestuous. Especially because we were doing it on a spare bed in my grandfather's house (my grandfather, not his; I suppose that makes it a bit more... normal?). But it was quite hot, which is bad. I don't want to have sex with my cousin! I haven't even thought about it! Well, he does have quite a tremendous penis (although Sam wouldn't like his ultra-droopy foreskin), but thankfully a big dick isn't all it takes to turn on Dawei.

But I just remembered that dream because I was (obsessively, as usual) trawling through my list of referrals, and I found a Google search for "how to ask your dad to wank with you". Ew! Sicko. But may I suggest just asking him? Perhaps over a football game on TV? He could ask if you wanted a beer, then you could reply in the affirmative. And then he could stretch out and note how hot it is, and how his Ruggers are uncomfortable, as he's been working in the yard laying pipes and bricks. And then you could suggest that he could take them off, as it's only he and you at home because Mom has gone to her sisters' house to help with the county pie bake-off. And then he could smirk and drop trou, revealing a jockstrap that appears to be straining at the seams; a mound of man-flesh clearly outlined against the fabric. Then he could suggest that you join him in the less-dressed state, as he feels silly sitting around in his underwear. Then you could drop your jeans, and you would both laugh that you're both wearing the same jock. Except his bulge is bigger, and you compliment him on it. Then he says that yours is very impressive, and all the girls must swoon over you. And then you say that you don't like girls, and Dad, you've been trying to tell him for some time now, but you're gay. And then he laughs, gets another beer for you both, and tells you that it's fine, that he's known for a long time, and it's okay. Hell, he used to fool around with Bobby McDonald back when he was in high school. Then you would get all wide-eyed, and he would get all slitty-eyed and comment that your bulge has gotten suddenly noticeably much bigger. And then...

Ahem.

Or something. Not that I've read anything like that in any bad gay erotica or anything.

Really!

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