You know what's annoying me at the moment? I mean other than fat people wearing skinny jeans or those uber-cutsie "You'll Love!..." Coles product phrase cartoon people (seriously, if someone needs a turbo pimpslap its that little cunt on the plain flour packet)? This fucking water "crisis" here in Queensland. BORING. Yes, I know we have no rain. That in itself is boring. But I'm sick of endless drought prattling. Endless "water updates" on the news. Endless dithering about what to do about it. Ugh. Like, this whole drought thing (which I'm sure is just part of normal weather cycles, not some hardcore global warming phenomenon) is so tedious, and just a convenient excuse for the stupid government. Our Queensland government has cocked up so much with our state infrastructure. Let's just add "water" to the list currently featuring "roads" and "public transport" of things that have been mismanaged, badly planned, and swept under the administrative rug and move on, shall we?

You'd think that the government should be happy that instead of mass-rioting and flame-bombing of government buildings, the majority of the public is happy to swallow the global warming myth. But rather than just fucking getting on with it and actually doing something about this problem (are those stupid dams being built, or is the Premier scared of being chased back to Brisbane by a herd of pissed-off cows who have had their sleep habits ruined by daylight savings? Has the desalinisation plant started yet? When are they making that piss-drinking factory?) the government is intent on demoralising and abusing its citizens for using resources for which they have properly paid!

I mean, don't get me started on that ridiculous referendum they were going to do to "vote in" recycled water. GROW SOME CUNTING BALLS, YOU USELESS SHITS! What's the fucking point of democracy if our leaders can't pull their fists out of their bleeding rectums? But then they go and waste MORE money on sending out those "forms" to high water users, threatening to trespass on their property and impose sanctions if they continue to improperly use water. Pfff. Our house got one of those forms because we were seventy litres over the limit! Seventy litres is like, a flush of the toilet, or an extra shower or something. I'm sorry, but if it ever gets to the stage where we have to leave fecal matter in the bowl, I'm so out of here. Anyway, those forms turned out to be a bad idea. So the government then spends MORE money printing up idiot stickers featuring some lame reject from the Sydney Olympics. My mother, as she is a bit of a smartarse, stuck the "Feeling lonely? Shower with a bucket!" sticker on my shower, and it took me about 500ml of water to get the stupid thing off. GREAT idea! And do you know what else they sent? One of those solid face washers that inflate when you put them in the bath. Included were instructions suggesting that people should take a bath with their new washer. Another great idea! Let's encourage people to save water by... encouraging them to have an extra bath! Idiots.

UGH! Sorry I had to get that off my chest. I just hate all this "green" fashion that's going on. Everyone is getting in on the act. It is SO common it just kills me. I even just saw Cate Blanchett, with whom I never normally have much beef, saying that she "races with herself" in the shower, chastising herself if she has a 4 minute shower. She thinks she can shower in 2 minutes, especially if she doesn't wash her hair. Yeah right. It takes my shower 2 minutes to warm up in the mornings, and then my hair NEEDS to be washed. And even though my hair is particularly short at the moment, it takes ages for the shampoo to wash out, now that my shower is fitted with those idiotic water saving heads. What a fucking useless system.

Rah!